Tsk, tsk, Michael Phelps. Partying your face off in public is not the way to reclaim your good-guy image.

The Olympian, who has been laying relatively low since his bong-smoking scandal in January, was out in full force Tuesday night at NYC hot spot Marquee.

“Michael was definitely having a good time,” an eyewitness tells us. “He was drinking straight from a bottle of Grey Goose, and when the deejay started playing M.I.A.’s ‘Paper Planes,’ he got up, started dancing like a loon and kept on yelling, ‘Shots!’”

Phelps definitely had enough alcohol on hand for several rounds — he’d ordered four bottles of vodka.

In addition, the athlete skeeved out onlookers when he persisted in PDA-ing with his girlfriend, cocktail waitress Caroline (Caz) Pal.

“They wouldn’t stop making out! They were literally sucking face, and not caring that anyone was watching,” says our snitch, who added that Phelps danced up such a storm that he briefly went shirtless, changing out of his T-shirt in the club and putting on a zip-up hoodie with nothing underneath.

But the night wasn’t all fun and games for Phelps. During the course of the evening, the champ recognized UConn basketball player Hasheem Thabeet and went over to introduce himself.

“Hasheem had absolutely no clue who Michael was, and [Phelps] walked away looking a little embarrassed,” says the onlooker.

The night ended for the champ around 2:30 a.m., when he was spotted getting into a cab and heading to a friend’s pad to “chill.” Hopefully, he didn’t engage in any “behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment,” as per the swimmer’s recent public apology for his past indiscretions.

A rep for Phelps didn’t return a call for comment by our deadline.

While Michael was perfecting his partying skills, his mom was having a far more sedate time over at the Grand Hyatt.

“Michael is in New York to be with his mama, of course,” Debbie Phelps told us at the “Dressed for Success” event. “He’s actually back in training right now.”

For what, Debbie? Is there an Olympic medal for clubbing?

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FRESH off another failed relationship, Lindsay Lohan is “the saddest girl in the world right now,” a friend said.

After a tumultuous year of breakups and make-ups, the starlet and deejay Samantha Ronson got into a big fight last week. A source close to Ronson told Page Six, “They are definitely broken up — hopefully this time it’s forever.”

Ronson’s family had a tearful Lohan barred by security from the party for Sam’s sister, Charlotte Ronson, at Bar Marmont in Los Angeles on Friday night. The next day, Ronson had the locks changed on her house in the Hollywood Hills.

Lohan had booked a room at the Chateau Marmont right below the Ronsons. Sam Twittered Lindsay over the weekend: “Please leave me alone, and stop staying in the room below me. You’ve woken me and my mother up. Go to bed.” Lindsay replied: “You broke my heart. Now go away.”

Adding to the drama, according to one source, is the fact that “Lindsay is on hiatus with her publicist because she’s not working or booking jobs.” The friend said, “She is completely unmanageable. It has never been possible to control her or advise her. Lindsay needs to get psychiatric help.

“Her friends are really sad for her, but she’s out of control, and now she’s all alone.”

Another friend of Lindsay lays some of the blame for her condition on Samantha, who “became more famous because of Lindsay and made more money when Sam brought her along to her deejay gigs.”

And Lindsay’s mother, Dina Lohan, who is with her daughter now in LA, also gets some blame. A pal of Lindsay said, “Dina is begging Lindsay’s friends to go there and help her. All of Lindsay’s life, Dina never acted like a role model. She only ever wanted to be her friend. Lindsay keeps getting used, and she never stood a chance at happiness.” Ronson did not return e-mails.

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The Material Girl is giving something back to the land of her ancestors.

Madonna has promised $500,000 to help victims of Italy’s devastating earthquake, said Fernando Caparso, mayor of Pacentro, the mountainside village where two of the pop star’s grandparents were born.

Carparso told The Associated Press on Wednesday that that he had spoken to the pop star’s manager and that he was deeply moved by Madonna’s effort to assist the town as well as surrounding areas.

“Madonna was the only one who could help us,” he said. “Other then being a great singer, a great rock star and an intelligent woman, with this gesture she has become a great woman,” he said.

Liz Rosenberg, the pop singer’s spokeswoman, confirmed that Madonna had pledged a “substantial amount,” in quake relief but didn’t disclose the exact figure.

The picturesque village, 100 kilometers (60 miles) from hard-hit L’Aquila, felt Monday’s earthquake but did not suffer serious damage. However Caparso said residents were terrified and some have been sleeping in tents or in their cars for fear of being crushed in collapsing buildings.

Caparso said the bulk of Madonna’s donation would be destined for areas harder hit.

In this tiny village, located below a snow covered mountain and overlooking a valley of olive groves, residents were mostly appreciative of the gesture - particularly coming at a time when the area was already experiencing economic problems.

“This was a tragedy for us, and I am very moved by what she did,” said Davide Battaglini, 33, who works for Italy’s financial police. “Our situation isn’t the best, factories have been closing, so a gesture from a star like her is very welcome.”

But Rosa Napoli, 90, was less than approving. “She is a woman that men like. She is not the Madonna that is worshipped in church,” Napoli said as she left a small church where she attended an evening Mass.

Madonna still has relatives in the town, who live in a four-story home along the main road leading up through the mountainside village. Giuseppe Mirandola, the son of her second cousins, answered the door at the entrance to the home, flanked by potted plants and trees.

“Journalists have been bothering my family for a long time,” Mirandola said from the door. “I don’t want to talk.”

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Joaquin, you have competition. In a radio appearance reminiscent of David’s Letterman’s recent interview with actor-turned-rapper Joaquin Phoenix, Billy Bob Thornton gave a puzzling and difficult interview Wednesday.

Appearing on CBC radio, the Canadian public broadcaster, Thornton evaded simple questions and criticized the host for mentioning his movie background.

Thornton appeared on the show with his band, the Boxmasters, who are on tour with Willie Nelson.

When host Jian Ghomeshi asked Thornton when the band formed, Thornton said: “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Thornton mostly gave brief, sometimes monosyllabic, answers. Asked what music he listened to when he was young, Thornton spoke about reading the magazine Famous Monsters of Filmland.

The actor took offense when Ghomeshi suggested he was passionate about music.

“Would you say that to Tom Petty?” asked Thornton.

Thornton eventually made it clear that he was angry with Ghomeshi for his introduction.

Ghomeshi began the show introducing the band by focusing on their music and prodigious output in less than two years. He did, though, introduce Thornton as an “Oscar-winning screenwriter, actor and director.”

“You were instructed not to talk about … like that,” said Thornton, using an expletive.

Ghomeshi, who’s also in the band Moxy Fruvous, replied that he was “just giving context.” The host said he was pleased to simply talk about music and pointed out Thornton’s band was getting attention partially because of the career he’s had.

The 53-year-old Thornton won an Academy Award for his screenplay to 1996’s “Sling Blade,” which he also starred in and directed. This year he stars in “Manure,” which played at the Sundance Film Festival, and “The Informers,” which comes out later this month.

A lifelong musician, he appeared sensitive to any suggestion that music was a mere “hobby.”

The interview, available to stream on http://www.cbc.ca/q/ and on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/user/Qtv , was receiving hundreds of comments from listeners who almost uniformly lambasted Thornton.

After the interview, the band performed an instrumental tune without Thornton - who didn’t have his instrument. “I’m a drummer … We don’t cart those around at 6 o’clock in the morning,” Thornton said.

Speaking by phone later, Ghomeshi said: “To not answer questions because I made the apparently egregious mistake of calling him an actor as well as a musician, it just seemed a little absurd.”

He added: “It does raise questions about the expectations of parameters that people ostensibly think that they put on us as arts, culture and entertainment journalists.”

Thornton’s publicist, Arnold Robinson, said the actor had no comment on the appearance.

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According to Star magazine, the couple have rekindled their “once red-hot sex life” with various trysts around town.

From hotel suites, to dressing rooms to backstage on Britney’s ‘Circus’ tour, the former couple has been hooking up whenever they feel the urge.

“It’s like they’re newlyweds all over again,” a family insider told Star. “Brit and Kevin can’t keep their hands off each other! The flings have made them both a lot happier.”

That may be so for them, but Federline’s girlfriend, ex-volleyball star Victoria Prince, is hardly thrilled. According to Star’s report, Prince busted Britney and Kevin in the act.

Ouch.

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Last week when Robert Downey Jr said that Garry Shandling was in Iron Man 2, I thought he was joking. But after seeing him on the set of the sure-to-be-excellent movie’s first day of shooting, I guess he was serious. I don’t know about you, but Garry Shandling and action movies go together like oil and water to me. And I am not going to comment about RDJ’s heels, oh wait I just did!

BTW IM2 producer/director John Favreau  is Twittering from the set if you want updates as the movie films!!!

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Adorable Kingston Rossdale is all over the tabloids magazines, so why he shouldn’t he check out his cute mug in them! Looking at the second picture it doesn’t look like he liked what he saw! But I love his face, so I will continue reading the gossip mags just to see it!!!

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The American Country Music Awards certainly brought a lot of extra buzz to Las Vegas over the weekend, but what really had temperatures soaring was Hugh Hefner’s 83rd Birthday at the Palms Resort & Casino. The festivities kicked off Saturday afternoon with a Palms Place pool party, hosted by (wait for it) Hef’s former flame, Holly Madison.

“I haven’t seen him since I left the mansion,” Madison told Tarts before his arrival. “And it is my first time filming “Girls Next Door” as a single lady so that’s exciting.”

But Madison wasn’t the only ex girlfriend who came to celebrate the special day, surprisingly Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt also strutted in (with their new lovers) to help Hef and his three new leading ladies Crystal Harris, Karissa Shannon & Kristina Shannon spice up Sin City and the birthday boy couldn’t have been more beside himself.

“As you can tell I am very, very happy. To celebrate my birthday with new girlfriends and former girlfriends is perfect, its wonderful,” he said. “I’ve had a life well-lived with so much satisfaction, I enjoy just looking back.”

(Speaking of which, we couldn’t help but keep a close eye on how the new and the old bonded and while chances are they probably aren’t necessarily BFFs, things appeared to be very civil and no claws came out!)

However when we asked what Madison missed most about mansion life her response was a love affair of a different kind.

“The zoo, the mansion has a fantastic zoo with birds and monkeys — I used to work in the zoo a lot and was really close to the zoo staff,” she said. “I fancied myself as an amateur zoologist.”

But Hef and the crazy creatures aren’t the only things Miss Madison has moved away from, she also promised Pop Tarts that her days of baring that bangin’ body are over … Sorry guys!

“I’m never getting naked again,” she vowed. “I’m over it, I’ve done it so many times. It is time to switch it up.”

Kendra on the other hand hasn’t ruled out posing for Playboy again — however conditions do apply.

“If Hank (Baskett, her fiancé) shoots the spread I will do it again,” Wilkinson told Tarts. “He has actually been practicing his photography skills. I’m a little more conservative nowadays, so I’ll pose for Playboy but only if Hank takes the photographs.”

On the note of posing, Madison happily showed off her simply sensational swimsuit body thanks to DWTS (even though she told us that she was “beaten up” and looked “disgusting with all the bruises”). But it seems even having been thru several seasons of “Girls Next Door” and the grueling ABC dance show, the 29-year-old isn’t ready to escape the reality arena.

“I’m developing my own reality show that I’m producing too, it’s going to be about me and my friends here in Vegas,” Madison added.

The busty blonde later joined fellow former flames Bridget and Kendra to surprise their ex-boyfriend with a custom birthday cake which was provided by Kerry Simon of Simon at Palms Place. In the evening Hef and all the girls had dinner at N9NE steakhouse before hitting up the Playboy Club. The publishing icon then partied in Moon Nightclub until the wee hours where Bridget sang him an ultra-sexy Marilyn Monroe-style rendition of Happy Birthday. Phew, so how does an 83-year-old manage to bunny hop around so much?

“Surrounding myself with beautiful women keeps me young,” Hef assured us with a cheeky smile.

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